This reminds me of an old song, "I just can't be Happy today".
Does it occur to you that you can never be happy, because on the one hand you are wishing for the bad end you are predicting to materialise, to prove you were right all along, and on the other you stand to be humiliated if the bad end you are predicting fails to come to pass. So there is no way for you to be happy, you have sealed off all possibilities of your own happiness, whatever happens.
I hope it was worth it, are you maybe invested in Bitcoin or something?