Thanks for posting, your memory in #2 struck a chord.

I remember also a particular experience, a girl I had fallen for, as soon as I laid eyes on her, at a dance event, she acted just as you described, very nervous.

It was her first time and I was relatively experienced and confident. I took her for a dance, and gently led her through some moves, then we stood and talked, and she seemed to really like me too. Then another guy came along, asked her for a dance, she asked me if that would be OK, to which I politely said of course. It is normal for learners to dance with as many new partners as possible, to increase their experience. And besides I don’t do jealousy, even if I am crazy about someone.

At that moment, I could have offered to buy her a drink whilst she was dancing.

But I chose to disappear.

Because I was scared.

I was scared at the strength of my feelings for her, even though I’d only just met her. I knew I would have given my life for her if we’d got involved, and that scared me to death.

So I disappeared, and have never seen her since.

That was almost three years ago, and I am still single, out dancing around now and then, with everyone and no-one in particular.

All I’m saying is, the reason I ran, had absolutely nothing to do with her awkwardness and nervousness, for me that just added to her allure.

But your story has given me some insight as to how she might have felt that night too, and I regret that.

Next time, if there ever is a next time, I will just buy the drink.

Solarpunk

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